What’s up, brosefs, it’s your man-in-the-red-light aka Bangkok Seven, and today is Friday. That means it’s time for another frowback article. Pretty sure Sweet3Mango was the original poster of this post, way back in 2018. Enough said. Let’s check it out…
“This is the 3rd installment in a series called “Thai Therapy” wherein I explore the idea that relocating to Thailand can be the cure for/solution to some common Western ills. Here’s one on breaking the chains of your tyrannical First World government, submitted for your consideration. It might be a hard pill for some to swallow, but give it a try and see how it tastes:
Unfortunately, The Land of Smiles is not devoid of government tyranny. If you’ve paid attention to any Thai-related articles in the last decade, then you’re already painfully aware. It’s bad news for Thais, but the good news for foreigners is, the kind of tyranny imposed here rarely and barely touches us. The Thai government focuses reserves its oppression for Thais, for the most part. Thus, as an American expat, I enjoy more freedom than most, if not all, of my countrymen back home. Here are just a few examples:
Taxes. Americans pay all kinds of taxes, both overt and hidden: federal, state, sales, sin, luxury, property, etc. until—after one adds it up—in total most middle class and above citizens pay upwards of 60% of their income on taxes. Not to mention, inflation itself is a tax. Americans lose 3% of the value of their liquid assets every year.
In Thailand, I pay 12% income tax as well as……..well, that’s pretty much it. If I eat somewhere fancy, I get to pay some sales tax (I think it’s 5%, I’ve never cared to look). But that’s the sum total of what the government pulls from my earnings. Amazing. It’s the best example of the kind of liberation an expat can enjoy here. You can rest easy knowing your overlords aren’t rinsing you like the class bully rinses a nerd on the playground. Gogo dancers, on the other hand—they’re a different story.
Speech. It’s true that there are heavy curbs on free speech in Thailand, but it’s mainly restricted to certain subjects. You can’t speak ill of the royal family, and you can’t really slag off the government too much. And that’s pretty much it. Contrast that with speech in the West in 2018, where Tommy Robinson was jailed for reporting on the trial of a Muslim rape gang, and Infowars was erased from all social media like a character from “1984.” The PC crowd has declared that all white straight males should be silenced, as well as Christians, conservatives, and literally anyone who supports President Trump. That kind of blatant fascism is cheered by half the population. Meanwhile a recent poll showed a majority of Trump supporters want him to have the power to silence the Media—an equally fascist, totalitarian sentiment. It’s as if the entire continent has acquired brain damage.
Police brutality and extortion. You have almost zero chance of being beaten up by a cop in Thailand. And while foreigners are often targeted for questionable offenses and fines, those fines are typically between $3 and $30. Compare that to the US, where the widespread training of police is a technique called “Bulletproof Warrior” that teachers cops to treat citizens like enemy insurgents, combined with the recent policy of not hiring anyone above a certain IQ and you get the current climate—cops beating and killing people at the drop of a hat. And nothing says “overreach” than having to pay a fine or go to jail for doing something that hurt no one and caused no property damage, like a U-turn or a lemonade stand. Or feeding the homeless. Or being homeless, all of which are somehow “crimes” in the US.
Poison in the air and food. When I visit my family in L.A., I’m always amazed at the blatant strafing of the sky over that city. Climate modification programs nationwide have for decades sprayed the public and their agriculture with barium and aluminum (an element connected to Alzheimer’s). Add to that the hormones and antibiotics in the meat, GMOs, sodium fluoride in the drinking water, and you’re basically “modified” care of your government to catch one of the big diseases.
Now, there’s plenty of that stuff in the food in Thailand, but if you make an effort you can actually avoid all of it. And yes, Bangkok has smog. But to get away from it, all you have to do is head out of town. There’s no way to escape being aero-ssaulted in the West.
(Update: I recently bought what I thought was a bottle of Leo from 7-11. Turns out it was an aluminum can molded into the shape of a bottle. If you don’t know why that’s significant, it’s because aluminum cans are lined with Bisphenol-A, making glass the only real container that doesn’t cause cancer. So the soft-kill agenda has made its way to Thailand, if only in small doses.)
Straws. There’s no better example of the West being led by retards than the California straw ban. Spawned from a baseless school report by a 9 year old (not kidding) the morons in Cali have outlawed straws in restaurants, to go along with your jail sentence if you use the wrong pronoun with a gender non-binary fluid vampire alien who wants you to call it “zikzak.”
In Thailand, not only are straws not outlawed, but there’s an over-abundance of them. Short ones, bendy ones, fat ones, thin ones. You could even put one of each in your drink and nobody’d bat an eye. Now, one problem they do have here is plastic pollution, and it would be really great for the country to get behind a push to reduce, reuse, and recycle instead of putting it all in the ocean. But at least they’re not caught up in the asinine nonexistent straw problem. Well, with one exception. A Mexican restaurant whom I won’t name (they’re on Sukhumvit Soi 18) have jumped on the idiot straw-vilifying bandwagon, prompting me to stop eating there. Thankfully, the recently-opened Cali-Mex still offers straws, and I don’t have to worry that my food is being prepared by a lobotomized primate.
(Update: strawphobia has reached Thailand, proving that there are idiots everywhere—even in paradise.)
I could probably think of more, but this short list alone is enough to sell the point. Anyone sick of the land of the fee and the home of the slave should seriously consider relocating to this part of the world. It’s warmer, it’s prettier, and the government won’t take a huge dump down the back of your shirt. And if you really are interested in relocating here, email me directly on Facebook and I’ll tell you how you can get a job and work visa so you can stay longer than 3 months. Or, just live vicariously through me by watching my videos and browsing the photos on FB and Twitter.”
A year later, these points still hold up, for the most part. As I’m going on a decade of self-imposed exile in Thailand, and peering, mouth agape, across the ocean at the insane political hysteria going on in the US, I’m even more convinced that moving here was something akin to escaping the Matrix. Washington is controlled by two parties, both of which are diabolical and out of control. The UK is in the same sad predicament. Australia has some shreds of sanity in government but the shift to rabid, frothing stupidity in their halls of parliament is inevitable. I couldn’t feel luckier to have ducked out of a world gone mad to this tiny corner of the planet where none of that garbage can touch me. Check back Sunday for the weekly, and cheers to all us lucky bastards who live truly free in this great country called Thailand.