Take This Blog and Shove It Part 10

What’s up gents, Seven here. It’s time to take apart another “why I hate Thailand” blog from 2014 where an absolute asshole who claims to have worked and lived in Thailand for “several months” (which of course makes him an expert and who) makes some pretty bold—and completely wrong—claims. Per usual, his identity will be omitted so as to avoid humiliating him. His cognitive diarrhea is in quotes while my responses are italicized. Let’s dive in:

“1. In schools, the teachers walk around with sticks every day. The beatings begin in kindergarten, with children of 4 years old, and continue until graduation. Rulers and hands are also used, and of course there’s the endless screaming…”


There are some schools where some teachers use sticks. But the vast majority of schools don’t, and there is no endless screaming except in your lunatic brain. Teaching at one school for a few months does not qualify you to speak about all schools, you dimwit. 

“2. Most apartments will not return your deposit at all, or will find a way to scam you out of a part of it. Common wisdom in Thailand is to assume that any deposit given on an apartment is lost money, and if you somehow recover it, to count it as a great bonus. Deposits are often between 1 and 2 months rent, so it’s significant. With all of the scams and thievery in Thailand, despite working here full-time for several months, I left this country with most of my savings depleted and significantly poorer than when I came in.”

That’s strange, because I’ve received my deposit back from every apartment I’ve rented for the last decade. Maybe you should’ve taken better care of your place. Oh, and I see now why you hate Thailand. You only stayed a few months, and yet somehow think you’re an authority on the country. You’re not. You’re just a prick. 

“3. Institutionalized racism and two-tier pricing for foreigners, here called “farangs”. If you’re a foreigner, expect to pay anywhere between double and 10 times the price that a local will have to pay. Many restaurants have two menus, with the English one having inflated prices. The government officially endorses this policy, with most tourist locations such as museums charging several times as much to foreigners. I paid 5-fold to get into a museum once, and it was a pretty sucky one at that.

Apartment buildings will also charge farangs more for renting the exact same room. So if you’re expecting to save money here, think again. Racism and discrimination is widespread here, but although every white person is treated as a bag of gold that needs to be shaken down, black and Filipino people here have it much, much worse. If you want to teach English, all you need is, as Thais say, a “white face”. It doesn’t matter if the black candidate for the job speaks better English than you. And when non-whites do get hired, they’ll be paid a third to a half less than their white colleagues.”

“Expect to pay 10 times the price that a local will pay.” Yes, to enter the state park, the Thai pays a dime and you pay a dollar. A dollar. You were charged a dollar. You should probably not bitch about paying A DOLLAR. And there are several reasons for the two tiers. The first is, farang teachers make double to triple the salary that Thais do, and the average tourist makes more in a year than most Thais will make in a lifetime. So if it costs you $3 for a t-shirt that a Thai paid $1 for, and you’re angry about it, the dick in that scenario is YOU. As for white farang being favored over other races, it’s because appearance means a lot more in Asia than it does in the West. Yes, Asia is racist. Not just Thailand, but the entire continent. If you didn’t know that before coming here, it’s your fault. Because Google’s been around for a long time. Every country on this continent places great importance on appearance, and in every Asian culture, dark skin means you work outside, which translates to lower class. You failed to mention that Asian countries are also rabidly racist against all other Asian countries. The Chinese think they are the best, and that Japanese, Koreans, Malaysians, Thais, etc. are all beneath them. The entire Eastern Hemisphere is racist. They are light-years ahead of the US when it comes to racism. Having said that though, a black teacher and a white teacher working at the same school make the same salary. Asshole.

“4. Thailand is the country of smiles the way America is the land of the free. The Thai smile is mostly fake and completely inappropriate. Thais will smile when they’re happy, angry, sad… it doesn’t matter what they’re feeling. This country is filled with the least emotionally healthy adults I’ve ever seen, and I’ve traveled quite a lot. In one case, I inquired about the photo of a young man on a wall, and the teacher, while laughing and smiling, told me that he was someone she knew, and that he had died because of a bomb explosion…”

“The Thai smile is inappropriate…” Huh. It sounds like you moved to a country with a completely different culture, and yet are holding the people there to the standard of the country you came from. Which makes you a cunt. Fake and inappropriate according to whom? You? You’re a moron, so forgive me if I don’t give a shit what you think is inappropriate.

Yes idiot, in Asia people smile for a variety of reasons that are culturally different from the West, usually when they are embarrassed. As a Westerner, if you came here to live and work, it is your responsibility to adapt to this culture, not expect Thais to know about or change to accommodate yours. You unbelievable asshole. The Thai Smile is completely appropriate in the context of Thai culture, which existed centuries before your shitty culture invented their “appropriate” reasons to smile. In terms of the timeline of humanity, the “inappropriate” reasons to smile are yours, you colossal dickhead.

Having said that, Thais smile for a lot of really good reasons, too. They have notoriously terrible poker faces. Most wear their hearts on their sleeves, and couldn’t keep from showing happiness even if they wanted to.

“5. Medical costs here are higher than in private hospitals and clinics in Europe. One night in a private hospital costs $550. Have fun trying to get your insurance to return that. Oh, and avoid the government ones, they’re more like a pre-morgue waiting area.”

What “insurance” are you talking about? Mine covers 85% of all expenses in private hospitals. When I crashed a motorbike and had to stay overnight, the total cost of everything including x-rays and meds was 800 baht. Are you just making stuff up, or are you so stupid that you think your bad experience is the same for everyone?

By the way, Europe has socialized medicine, which means that yes, fees are cheap. However, if you need something expensive like a complicated surgery, you might have to wait months or years to get it done. Maybe research the difference between socialism and capitalism to get a better handle on this harsh reality.

“6. I tried to buy some Bitcoins on a Hong Kong exchange. I went to Kasikorn bank where I have an account and asked for them to transfer $100. They said the fee for a $100 international transfer would be $37. Never in all my experience of travel has someone tried to charge me 37% for a transaction. Except governments of course.”

Wait, what? You asked a Thai bank, which doesn’t have an IBAN number, to transfer money to a Hong Kong exchange? You have a Thai bank account, so what’s your excuse for not knowing they’re on a completely separate system? Are you retarded? Learn how banks work, idiot.

“7. I once tried to send something by Thai post. When my co-workers found out, they were shocked. Apparently I should have somehow known that anything put into that system would be stolen. My boss told me that 10 million packages are stolen or lost by the Thai postal workers every year. When a postal worker is caught stealing, the punishment is that they’re “made to apologize”. Neither the stolen items nor their value (they are usually sold immediately) is returned, and the worker does not lose their job. The postal service is therefore filled with career thieves.”


In a decade living here, I’ve sent over 100 packages and received around 50. Not one of them was stolen. You’re a douche canoe.

“8. In my time teaching English in Thailand, every single lesson on occupations involved a significant number of my students saying they wanted to be police officers. This is despite the common knowledge that all they do is arrest people and steal money. When I tried to elicit ‘What does a policeman do?’ Nobody knew what to say, as the idea that police ‘help people’ here is laughable. So they were acting with full knowledge of what they’re getting into. It’s pretty depressing to know how many of my students are planning to be career criminals with a badge.”

You must’ve worked at a government school, where the sts are quite poor, and the easiest if not only way to get out of poverty is to become a cop. If you had the skills or qualification to teach at a better school, your students would have goals like CEO, engineer, or diplomat.

Oh, and what do you mean by “every single lesson on occupation”? You lived here for a few months. How many lessons on occupation did you give in that short time? Or are you just using hyperbole because you’re a bad writer? It’s a rhetorical question. I already know the answer.


“9. Many Thais are passive aggressive. They will avoid any direct confrontation and not tell you what’s happening, usually to act behind your back. Ask for feedback from an assistant during a lesson and they will say “everything is okay”, only to have a meeting of unresolved issues that have festered a month later. Oh, and though the Thais in the meeting are all English teachers, they’ll all speak in Thai for an hour so you can’t understand or respond to them. Enjoy hearing your name or “farang” but having no idea what they’re saying.”

That’s because in Thai culture as well as most other Asian cultures, it’s not appropriate to raise issues or confront someone for fear of losing face. Man, you’re super ignorant about the country you chose to relocate to. Oh, and of course the Thai English teachers speak in Thai during the meeting. Would a bunch of American Spanish teachers in, say, Ohio speak Spanish in their meeting? Fucking moron.

Oh, and the reason you have no idea what they’re saying is, you couldn’t be bothered to learn Thai. Yes Thai, the native language of the country you moved to. It’s not their responsibility or obligation to learn and then speak in your language when you’re around, you bigoted shit pile.

“10. Packs of wild dogs will run after you at night. Sometimes even during the day. Get a series of rabies shots before you come here. Camping out at night is dangerous.”

Hahahahaaa, what an asshole! So you lived in some tiny, outlying town in the middle of nowhere. Yes, soi dogs run those towns at night, so get yourself a stick and stop being a blood-belching vagina. Alternatively, build a time machine, go back in time, have made better choices, and come to Thailand with a CV that would open doors to better schools in a big city.


“11. Mosquitoes carry dengue fever and malaria. Most people who’ve stayed here for longer than a year have had dengue, and it usually ends in a multi-day hospital stay. Make sure you have the insurance to cover it.”

I’ve lived here for 10 years. Been bit thousands of times. Never got dengue or malaria. And none of the hundreds of people I know who’ve lived here for years have either. And I’d bet money that neither did you. You’re just lookin’ for stuff to hate on because you’re an intolerable cunt.

“12. Many agencies that place teachers with schools will be late on payments or not pay you the full amount.”

This is true—for unqualified teachers teaching illegally in Thailand. Busted, shitbird.

“13. Everyone in Thailand is a matchmaker. In fact, half of them are matchmakers even if you’re already in a relationship. As a foreigner in Thailand, expect people to ask you if you have a girlfriend several times a day, and then run off looking for one for you if you don’t. They’ll take pictures, too. When your students in college find out that you do have a girlfriend, the next question will be: “Do you want a mistress?” (in Thai, of course, their level of English cannot handle such sentences). In the school I worked at, I was told to avoid getting into an elevator with students because they will grope (sexually assault) you.”

Horse shit. When you lie in your blog, it discredits everything else you post as well.

Yes, Thais want to play matchmaker, because they’re trying to help. Yes, there’s such a thing as a “mia noi” or mistress in Thai society because their country wasn’t founded by Puritans, so their ideas about morality aren’t the same as yours. If you want to argue that your culture is somehow “better” for that reason, send me your address so I can mail you your Klan hood. Oh, and I love your subtle dig at them for not knowing English, despite the fact that no one’s ever taught them English. How many languages have you taught yourself to speak, dick? I’m going to guess…none. And FYI, expecting everyone in a foreign country to speak YOUR native language is racist.

By the way, I’ve been in countless elevators with hundreds of students and none of them ever made physical contact. You either made that shit up or “were told” a lie.

“14. There is no concept of privacy or boundaries of any sort. I learned quite quickly that within a few hours everyone will know everything you shared with a Thai person, no matter how private. The culture here lives on gossip and rumors. Thais will ask you the most personal questions, only to run off and tell everyone else minutes later. They’ll try and spy on you, too. If you want a private life, you’ll need to come up with a lot of elaborate lies, because simply keeping quiet is interpreted as a sign of great disrespect.”

Yes, Thais gossip. Well done, you’ve managed in this long tirade to stumble on one flaw in Thai culture. But here’s an easy solution: Don’t do or say anything that warrants disrespect, and you’ll be fine.

By the way, there are all kinds of boundaries in Thailand. You’re just too stupid to know what they are.

“15. The nationalism and religiosity makes me sick. Seriously. Every movie at a cinema, after 35 minutes of adverts, begins with a nationalistic song and a series of creepy pictures of the king, all of which are a good 20-30 years old… because pictures of an aged king just won’t do I guess. And everyone around you stands up on command like trained puppies, until the clip ends. In schools, the anthem plays in the morning and everyone must freeze… If you think nationalism in the West is bad, wait till you get to Thailand.”

So let me get this straight. Because you’re not a nationalist, and take no pride in the country you’re from, and aren’t religious, that means everyone else should be like you? Fuck you. Fuck you for thinking it’s OK to impose your stupid ideals on other people. You’re not a libertarian. You’re a fascist pig.

“16. The expat community is composed almost entirely of alcoholics. Being a teetotaler, this made my interaction with other foreign teachers and expats here a largely miserable experience. I thought college was bad, but it paled in comparison to the psychological dysfunction and alcoholism here.”

The expat community is huge. A quarter of a million as of 2010. So, to speak for that many people, when you clearly only lived in a small town in the boondocks for a few months, isn’t just arrogant. It’s ignorant. In fact, your entire blog is based on a lack of understanding of everything you experienced in Thailand. You attributed to huge swaths of the population the things you perceived through your own self-absorbed, stupid mindset and from that wrote an entire blog of bullshit. You are a stupid cunt.


Whew! What an unbelievable asshole. So in a list of 16 gripes, this fucksack found one valid complaint: Thais gossip. I’m gonna go ahead and say that the weather, cost of living, freedom, beaches, food, fun, kind-hearted people, and hordes of gorgeous women outweigh the horrific crime of gossip. Check and mate to this shit-for-brains and his asinine blog. Tune in Friday for a frowback, and between now and then, be sure to raise a glass to Thailand—the greatest country in the world apart from the gossip. Peace out!